Triathlon, depressed ranting
Sh#t, You know I really did start this Blog thing’y cos it made me feel good about talking about something that helped me get over a serious illness that fu##ed me for a long time. I still have not got over it’s insidious hold on everything I do.
Lately I have been struggling BIG time with the ugly side of depression.
I know that being involved in a sporting pursuit has so many positive benefits but still I let, and I say LET the fog eat me from time to time.
The motivation to be involved, has to come from the inside but the constant struggle wears on you.
Hey, I am so shit’y with my self that I am in the place that I am at this present time but that is part of the mission that I am on.
You see I am one of the people that go around under the cloud of depression, but am a 6′3′ ,90kg , healthy looking individual that has competed for Australia, hold state titles in 2 different sports and run my own business.
I let the fog get hold when, I do not set my sights on a goal that I can back out of, or let the pain of not being the best I can be outweigh the pain of doing the best I can be content with, BIG difference.
When you settle for contentment, you use the comfort levels that tie you to a place of mediocrity that has blunted the desire to be the you, who you know you desire to be.
It is easy to eat the second helping of ice cream( insert your own vice) and feel a little guilty the first couple of times, after a while it becomes the norm and the you eventually find your belly is on your knees and you find another excuse not to initiate the action that you, IE, the internal you, knows, has to be activated to be able to feel good about yourself and your place in the world.
It is a complex issue, I have seen the fog of depression hit those, that have gifts of genetics, wealth, and status.
I have no definitive answers, though what I do know, is the way I can encourage people to get on the other side of a place, that seems to have high walls, stark lights and be an empty void, is to step up to the start line and get blood to your brain, accountable action, and social interaction.
Sorry about the rant but hey it’s my blog
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2 Responses to “Triathlon, depressed ranting”
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Russel, I read you comment on my site about the swimming and it led me here to your site. We are of like mind, as I survived leukemia a few years back and used triathlons as a way to come back to life. Did a sprint, olympic and half iron the year after my illness to feel alive again. I agree about being in the present, as that has always caused problems with me in the past. Anyway, just wanted to say hi and say I appreciate your work here on this site! Best of luck…Brad
Thanks for taking the time to comment Brad,
I also have the unswerving belief that taking part in life and allowing all events that occur to be viewed as a learning and getting of wisdom.
By not allowing yourself to go down the path of seeing your self in any victim mode is a key to owning your life.
Great to hear you are a surviver of an event that would have been a difficult learning time, Keep stepping up to the start line and spread the word that life is a wonderful journey